Starring Hugh Jackman, Nicholas Braun, Emma Thompson, Conleth Hill, Julia Louis-Dreyfuss, Bryan Cranston, Chris O’Dowd, Patrick Stewart, Brett Goldstein, Bella Ramsay, Rhys Darby, Regina Hall.

Directed by Kyle Balda

Amazon MGM Studios/Working Title/Sony Pictures – in Cinemas now

When a kindly shepherd is murdered, his whodunnit obsessed flock work together to expose his killer.

At the top of this page you will see the sentence ‘Sci-Fi Bulletin: Exploring the Universes of SF, Fantasy, Horror and Spy-fi!’ to which, for one day only, I ask you (and our esteemed editor) to add the words ‘…and the unclassifiably bonkers’.

It took me a while to tune into Kyle Balda’s Babe-esque murder mystery. I couldn’t quite cope with Huge Action’s West Country Australian accent; nor the picture book rural colour palette turned up to eleven like a 1970s colour telly; nor the honey-stoned English village where all the shops and the police station are helpfully indicated in primary neon; nor Nicholas Braun (Cousin Greg from Succession) working out whether his hapless country copper was going to be ‘cockerney’ or ‘mummerset’; nor Bryan Cranston, Chris O’Dowd, Patrick Stewart, Rhys Darby, Brett Goldstein and Bella Ramsay as the oddly disembodied voices of marginally creepy CGI sheep; nor seemingly random world-rules concerning collective amnesia and road phobia to name but a couple.

But… but… a bit like Patrick Stewart’s old nemeses, The Borg (as opposed to the mint sauce and redcurrant jelly awaiting his character here), resistance to The Sheep Detectives is futile… unless you’re the sort of person who worries that if George the Shepherd really doesn’t think that sheep are to be sold for meat then his business model might not be sustainable, or that anyone arrested for murder should really have their rights read to them, and is entitled to legal representation during questioning.

Against my better judgement, after about twenty minutes I was laughing out loud at Craig Mazin’s bonkers script, as it dipped its toes into weightier matters with Bryan Cranston’s battle-scarred Icelandic Ram, Sebastian, explaining God to his woolly companions and failing to make any sense at all. The action unfolds like an ovine remake of The Thursday Murder Club only a lot more tightly written, with a story I cared about and better acting from its digital protagonists.

Respect to Mazin, though, for surely being one of the most eclectic screen writers on the planet with credits ranging from the Scary Movie franchise to the brilliant Chernobyl to the universally admired Last of Us and then to this.

Verdict: The Sheep Detectives may go over the heads of some its younger audiences, but for seven or eight years and upwards there’s lots to enjoy… although I did come out dreaming of a nice Sunday roast with all the trimmings. 7/10

Martin Jameson

www.ninjamarmoset.com