Arrow Video, out now

A secret tryst that was brutally cut short on Valentine’s Day an unlucky thirteen years ago comes back to haunt the teens who linger around the lovers lane where the double slaying took place.

Directed by John Ward in 1999, and marking Anna Faris’ horror debut a year before Scary Movie, this cliched slasher movie arrives just too late in the cycle to say anything new.

A hook-handed killer escapes from an asylum (with typically lax security measures), returning to town to enact his kills over a holiday period. Unfortunately, this is no Halloween or Friday the 13th, though it borrows moments from both series. And coming out in the wake of Scream, it all feels so tired and unnecessary. The hook-wielding killer had already been done to death in Candyman (1992) and I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997), and Lovers Lane adds zero to this sub-genre.

The cinematography is poor, with grainy dark scenes that are difficult to register, and in two cases it’s an opportunity to coyly showcase some nudity. Even the kills pull the punches, frequently happening off-screen, and as for the plot… let’s just say that the ending makes no sense whatsoever, adding twists where none are earned or warranted.

Arrow Video present the feature in a new 2K restoration from a 4K scan of the original 35mm camera negative, in both widescreen 1.85:1 version and full-frame 1.33:1 (4:3), and it’s a good transfer. There’s a new audio commentary with writer-producers Geof Miller and Rory Veal. featurette with Geof Miller and Rory Veal and actors Matt Riedy and Carter Roy as well as an illustrated collector’s booklet featuring new writing on the film by Lindsay Hallam and a double-sided fold-out poster.

Verdict: Undeserving of such special treatment, this poor quality slasher pic benefits from all the bells and whistles of an Arrow special edition, but it’s purely for the devoted. 4/10

Nick Joy