goodFebruary 2017 sees the publication of the final part of Toby Venables’ Hunter of Sherwood trilogy. Simply entitled Hood, it centres on his hero Guy of Gisburne as he heads for the ultimate showdown with England’s best-loved psychopathic outlaw. And, as Venables explains here, as you may have guessed, it’s not your usual Robin Hood story…

It’s clearly not science fiction, however. It’s not even really fantasy; the 12th century backdrop is as true to the period as I can make it. Yet the whole time I have been writing in this tough, grimy medieval world, I have had zombies in mind. And solutions to zombies.

Let me explain. My first novel, The Viking Dead, actually was about zombies, albeit in a massively over-engineered Viking context. The juxtaposition seemed interesting to me (I mean Vikings and zombies – what’s not to like?) but also a fundamental truth emerged which subsequent years in the world of the medieval confirmed. To survive zombies – and to survive the Big Nothing that comes after – you have to let go of modernity. You have to go medieval.

Consider this: The zombie apocalypse has happened. You’re in a huge mall that sells everything – US style. What do you grab first? Guns? Lots of guns? OK, you’ve just ensured you’ll last the week. Maybe five days.

First problem: Guns are loud. That one zed you shot? Great job – but now 100 more are coming your way.

Second problem: Guns need ammunition, and no one is making that shit any more. Unless you can make it from scratch, it is a finite resource – and the clock is ticking. I give it a week. And if something breaks or jams, it’s you fixing it – or dying because you can’t.

red-handSo, what is simple, quiet, with a renewable source of ammunition, but still lethal? Well, Robin and his Merry Men – who relied on what the forest could provide – had the answer.

A longbow is one of the simplest piece of technology – a string and a stick. But it works. If you had to, you could make one. The arrows can be made from scratch too, with very little expertise (and you’ll develop that anyway). Even a badly made arrow can do the job at close range. So forget moving parts. Forget crossbows, compound bows, and fancy takedown bows. It’s not about how good it looks any more. You’re still going to look silly with a cool compound bow but no internal organs.

There are other things you might wish to put aside for the big day. You’ll see a theme emerging in them. Sometimes, whatever you do, the zeds get close, so you’ll likely need a light, manageable weapon to chop or smash heads. Medieval knights and men-at-arms had answers to this. Vikings too. Chopping and smashing of heads was something they were called upon to do on a regular basis. So, get a reasonable sword to have at your side, and a short mace for good measure. Maybe also a dagger for close quarters or confined spaces.

Clearly, in that circumstance, you’ll also need something to protect from the bites of the undead – something flexible, but impenetrable, which might also protect you from attacks by other bow and blade-wielding survivors.

By now, I imagine, you’re getting the idea. Chain mail has been around for a thousand years, and it’s high time it came back into fashion. While you’re at it, get a horse to complete the picture. No petrol required – what it eats, you can grow, and it can even fertilise those crops for you.

tobyMy advice, then, boils down to this one simple thing: go medieval on its ass. Literally. Learn to make and do. Learn to live free of industry. Of mass production. Of anything you cannot achieve with your own two hands. Learn to grow food, keep animals, make clothes, hunt, start fires. When Z-Day comes, the future of humanity lies in its past. Spending time in the 12th century has prepared me for that better than any zombie shoot-em-up.

This, after all, is the underlying message of every zombie movie: get out of the city; let go of consumerism (unless you want to die in that mall); become self-reliant. Perhaps this is ultimately why we enjoy zombie movies. They wipe away the baffling complexities of modern life and bring it back down to what we can directly affect – literally putting life back in our own hands.

So what should you have grabbed in that mall, besides immediate food and water? Tools. The means to make and do. If you did, congratulations – you just increased your survival chances by 1,000%.

Hood is out now in the US and the UK